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How's everyone else holding up?

Anyone know why they all have bags of candy

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn!

What's the difference between a cake and a school bus?

Jill: I don't know. Janet: I'm glad I didn't send you to pick up my birthday cake!

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

Why do you hold your hand flat above your eyes when you look into the distance?

Because when you would cover your eyes with your hand, you wouldn't see sh*t. I'm lame.

What's the appropriate age to take the electric shock collar off your kid?

My son's 10 years... hold on... OFF THE COUCH! brb... convulsing.

Bag Jokes More Bag Jokes

What's the difference between a small child and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window.

What are you doing, dad?

Filing taxes... LOLJK... I'm googling "non-extraditable countries". Pack your bags, kid! We're going to Libya!"

Candy Jokes More Candy Jokes

Why do they print nutritional information on Snickers bars?

If you don't know candy is bad for you, what are the chances you can read

Where do ISIS fighters go to purchase soda and candy?

Allahu snackbar!