What can a cup of coffee and a cow that's had an abortion have in common?

They're both de-calf-inated.

This joke may have profanity.

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Coffee Jokes More Coffee Jokes

How are you doing this morning?

Me: *finishing hanging bag of coffee upside down like an IV and tying my arm off* Fine, you

Where did Nicholas II of Russia get his coffee?

Tsarbucks.

Cow Jokes More Cow Jokes

What do you get when you administer marijuana to cows?

High steaks! (I'll just see my way out...)

Why does a cow need a bell?

Because its horn doesn't work.

Abortion Jokes More Abortion Jokes

What's the best part about abortions?

They never get old

What is the most effective form of birth control?

Abortions.

Cup Jokes More Cup Jokes

What's the difference between a cup and a mug?

Being cupped is far more pleasurable than being mugged

What do you call a cup with a Confederate flag on it?

A Hiccup! Get it? Hick-cup?

Inate Jokes More Inate Jokes

What do you call a cow that just gave birth?

De-calf-inated