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What did God say to Noah?

Make a backup, I need to re-format this.

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Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What's the main thing a woman needs to think about when considering a potential boyfriend?

Is this the man I want my kids to spend every second weekend with?

How many Mexicans do you need to change a Lightbulb?

Juan.

God Jokes More God Jokes

Why do we have oceans?

Because based god and acid god had a baby.

What, why?

Is it my hair Her: no Me: MY LOOKS! Her: no, it's your personality Me: oh thank god

Backup Jokes More Backup Jokes

How many livers do people have?

I want to make sure I have a backup before I put this thing on Ebay.

What would you do if you had to arrest your mother?

New Recruit: Call for backup!

Noah Jokes More Noah Jokes

What did God say to Noah?

Make a backup, I need to re-format this.

Where did Noah keep his bees?

In the ark hives

Format Jokes More Format Jokes

How many religious women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Nun.

Whatcha got, reddit?

I am not funny and I need to be. I am writing a script for a short show that's formatted like "Weekend Update" on Saturday Night Live. So that means one sentence about the topic, and then one liner joke. Thank you all!