What did he tell people in order to mak...

What do Green Eggs and Ham, and Fifty Shades of Gray have in common?

They both encourage people who can barely read to try new things.

Why are all these people dead on the inside?

Sir, this is a morgue.

How do u tell the population of a small native village?

Throw a bunch of pocket change in the middle of town. How do u tell who is the richest person in that village? Find the person who gathered the most change.

What did carbon yell at gold while trying to get his attention?

A! U!!! If it doesn't make sense tell it so someone out loud. Pretty sure this is my first original joke

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What was your college major?

Me: How to avoid student-loan debt, with a minor in teen pregnancy.

Where are people in Dallas staying to avoid getting Ebola?

The Cowboys Stadium. Because they can't catch anything there.

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How long does it take for stormtroopers to obey Kylo Ren?

Just the First Order.

What happens when doughnuts join a sorority?

They have to go through the glazing. I'm sorry I'm a baker it just came to me... Pun-ishment is in order.

What did he tell people in order to make them avoid taking it?