What did one fish say to the other?

Keep your mouth shut and you'll never get caught.

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Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

Why was the penguin banned from the Winter Olympics?

He was caught taking Polaroids.

What do you say when trying to catch the elevator?

Hodor! Hodor!

Shut Jokes More Shut Jokes

Which part of your body shuts down last when you die?

The eyes, cause they di-late.

When do you know a lawyer is telling the truth?

When his lips are shut.

Mouth Jokes More Mouth Jokes

Why is being a politician more difficult than being a ventriloquist?

Ventriloquists have to be able to speak with their mouths closed. Politicians speak out of both sides of their mouths simultaneously.

What's grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow?

An elephant rolling down a hill with a daisy in its mouth!

Fish Jokes More Fish Jokes

What sort of net is useless for catching fish?

A football net!

Why was little Jimmy fishing in the well?

Because Tom had previously drowned in the well and everyone said "Tom is sleeping with the fishes."