April Sale - 20% Off

Which part of your body shuts down last when you die?

The eyes, cause they di-late.

Previous Random Joke Next

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

How long does it take a baby to die in the microwave?

I don't know, I lose track of time when I have an erection.

Why does Snape teach options and not herbology?

His lily died

Shut Jokes More Shut Jokes

What do you call a conservative toothbrush that won't shut up?

Brush Limbaugh

Which one do you let in?

The dog, once he's in, he shuts up!

Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

Why were the sandwich fillers eyes too close together?

Because he was in-bread.

How did Columbus's men sleep on their ships?

With their eyes shut!

Body Jokes More Body Jokes

Why do ostriches have long necks?

Because their heads are so far from their bodies!

How many Polish people does it take to be pallbearers at a funeral?

Seven. Six to carry the casket and one to drag the body

Di Jokes More Di Jokes

Wherefore art thou Romeo?

Romeo: New phone. Who dis

What did Dodi Fayed say to his driver?

Want to go out with me and Di tonight?