What did the conceited man say while he stood on the north pole?

The earth revolves around me.

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Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What do you call a person who you had a one night stand with on Mars?

A solmate

Why couldn't the bicycle stand up for itself?

Because it was two-tyred.

Earth Jokes More Earth Jokes

What does the last man on earth watch on tv?

Reruns

What do you call a fissure in the earth that houses old Russian rulers who like to mock others ironically?

Tsar-Chasm

Revolve Jokes More Revolve Jokes

How many US Congress members does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one. They just hold it still and wait for the world to revolve around them.

How does an engineer screw a light-bulb?

He holds the light-bulb over the socket and waits for the world to revolve around him.

North Pole Jokes More North Pole Jokes

Who's got the tightest bod in the North Pole?

Abdominal Snowman

What do you call a drill on the North Pole that just wants to get to know people?

An icebreaker