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What do you call a drunk who happens upon the scene of a crime?

An innocent bystumbler

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happened to the dog that fell into a lens-grinding machine?

He made a spectacle of himself.

What happens when you take acid with a birth control pill?

A trip without the kids

Crime Jokes More Crime Jokes

Why aren't you allowed alcohol on a golf course?

Because it's a crime to drink and drive.

What did the mayor of dinosaur town say when crime increased by 50%?

This calls for Jurastic changes

Drunk Jokes More Drunk Jokes

What's the difference between a drunk and a stoner?

A drunk drives right through a stop sign, a stoner waits for it to turn green.

What are you gonna be for Halloween?

Me: Drunk!

Scene Jokes More Scene Jokes

Why are condoms transparent?

So that sperms can at least enjoy the scene even if their entry is Restricted!

Why did the director get kicked out of the bar?

He was making a scene!