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What do you need to make a crystal salad?

Onions, tomatoes, and a whole bunch of lattice

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Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What are your best family friendly Christmas jokes?

I need some for tonight.

When I was on the plane the stewardess asked, do you need some headphones?

I said, Hell Yeah, but how did you know my name was Phones

Bunch Jokes More Bunch Jokes

What happens when a bunch of ferrets get together?

None of your business.

What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies?

A bingo machine.

Onion Jokes More Onion Jokes

What do onions and people have in common?

I weep uncontrollably when I cut them.

What's the difference between a saxophone and an onion?

You don't cry when you cut up a saxophone. Happy Saxophone Day Why this musical abomination deserves its own day is beyond me. Edit: beside to beyond

Tomatoe Jokes More Tomatoe Jokes

What's red and invisible at the same time?

No tomatoes.

What do you call five tomatoes?

A tom-a-FOOT! In Europe, they call it a tom-a-METER.