What do Jesus and your mom have in common?

They both got nailed all night.

This joke may have profanity.

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Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What did one plant say to the other plant that was annoying him?

Please leaf me alone! Or I'll tell my mom, and you'll get in trouble.

What did little Paul Bunyan say when his mom asked him how he damaged his favorite toy?

It was an ax-I-dent.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Why doesn't Jesus enjoy manicures or pedicures?

Because they always try to mess with his nails.

How did Jesus feel when they crucified him?

He was cross.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

What's the similarity between your wife and a tin roof in a hurricane?

If you didn't nail them properly they'll go see your neighbor

What is a blonde's definition of a naval destroyer?

A hula hoop with a nail in it.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What do brunettes and red-heads do on Friday nights?

Make blonde jokes!

How do these presidential candidates sleep at night?

With an electorate blanket.