How are you supposed to buy a gift for your mom as an adult?

It's like, oh you gave birth to me Please enjoy this fancy candle.

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Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

Who pushed the neonate out an endometrium?

Your mom.

Why is my mom always right about everything?

Because she said so and that's final.

Gift Jokes More Gift Jokes

What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas?

I don't know. He still hasn't opened his gifts.

Why doesn't Santa give gifts to naughty kids?

Because it'd Krampus style.

Enjoy Jokes More Enjoy Jokes

Why don't the French enjoy travelling to Northern Ireland?

Because they don't like the smell of Derry air.

What do call someone who takes care of reindeer and really enjoys it?

A Jolly Rancher.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Where does the Empire buy their robes?

The Darth Mall!

What happens when the President dies?

The Vice President takes over. What happens when the Vice President dies? The Speaker of the House takes over. What happens when the Speaker of the House dies? You go to Radio Shack and buy a new speaker.

Birth Jokes More Birth Jokes

How are you supposed to buy a gift for your mom as an adult?

It's like, oh you gave birth to me Please enjoy this fancy candle.

What is your date of birth?

Witness: "July 15th." Lawyer: "What year " Witness: "Every year."

Suppose Jokes More Suppose Jokes

What's supposed to be funny, but let's you down?

This joke...

Why are 490 Romans are funny?

Because XD Edit: Sorry about the typo the second are is not supposed to be here

Adult Jokes More Adult Jokes

What are children generally better at then adults?

Giving the pope an errection

Why do adults like Legos so much, when they grow old?

They can't lego of their childhood. Tell some more Lego puns, here!