What does an insomniac, agnostic, dyslexic spend most of his time doing?

Staying up all night wondering if there really is a dog.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

Why did the dog sleep on the chandelier?

Because he was a light sleeper.

What do you call a dog riding in a submarine?

A subwoofer.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What time is bedtime at Neverland Ranch?

When the big hand touches the little hand.

Where does Ben Carson spend most of his time on Reddit?

R/explainlikeimfive

Spend Jokes More Spend Jokes

Why didn't the man report his stolen credit card?

The thief was spending less then his wife.

Where does Ben Carson spend most of his time on Reddit?

R/explainlikeimfive

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

What did one hat say to another?

You stay here, I'll go on a head!

When I was kid, and we'd go sledding on a cold snowy day, Ya know how often I had to rub my hands together to stay warm?

Intermittenly.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

Whats the German version of silent night?

Kristall nacht

How did the astronaut land on the sun?

He went at night.

Wonder Jokes More Wonder Jokes

What do you get when you're agnostic, dyslexic, and an insomniac?

You stay up all night wondering if there's a dog.

What do you get if you cross an insomniac, an agnostic, and a dyslexic?

A person who stays up all night wondering if there is a dog.