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What has four wheels and can't support a family?

A liberal arts major. I lied about the wheels.

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What do you want for your birthday?

Me: You could get me a "world's best dad" mug. 4: You told me not to lie.

Why is a restless man in bed like a lawyer?

Because he lies on one side and then turns around and lies on the other one.

Family Jokes More Family Jokes

What did the orphan get for Christmas?

A family.

Why did the family not laugh at the Obstetrician's joke?

Because he screwed up the delivery...

Wheel Jokes More Wheel Jokes

Why were you asleep at the wheel?

Motorist: Your siren lulled me to sleep.

What do Hispanic parents say to teach their son to drive?

Jesus, take the wheel!

Support Jokes More Support Jokes

What does a female snake use for support?

A co-Bra!

What did the left breast say to the right breast?

We better get some support soon or everyone'll think we're nuts

Liberal Art Major Jokes More Liberal Art Major Jokes

What's the difference between a liberal arts major and a pizza?

The pizza can feed a family.

What do liberal arts majors yell when overwhelmed?

Oh,the humanities!