What is something that is always heard but never seen?

A member of the Queen's guard doing a single squat.

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Member Jokes More Member Jokes

What do members of secret societies use when they get a head cold?

An Illumi-neti pot

How many members of the NRA does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

More guns.

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

Why the big pause................................?

Said the man in the pub to the bear. First heard this joke told by Eddie Izzard.

What did the farmer say when he heard the town gossiping about his cornfield fire?

My ears are burning!

Queen Jokes More Queen Jokes

What do you call a person whose wife was the Queen, daughter is a Princess and his boss is the Emperor, but he himself is no royal?

Darth Vader.

What is it called when the Queen farts?

A noble gas!

Queen Guard Jokes More Queen Guard Jokes

What is something that is always heard but never seen?

A member of the Queen's guard doing a single squat.

How is a Mac like a Queen's guard?

They're both run by Unix.