What is the fastest way to lose pounds?

Leave EU.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What is it called when a reptile loses its tail?

Ereptile Dysfunction

Why did the marijuana addict lose the race?

He was running on fumes.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why is the dating app called Tinder?

When you left-swipe, all of your matches go up in flames.

What's wrongdad?

Dad: I told you, my head hurts. Son: This is why mom left.

Eu Jokes More Eu Jokes

What's the difference between English Breakfast and Irish Breakfast tea?

One is still in the EU.

What did UK say while leaving?

It's not EU, it's me

Pound Jokes More Pound Jokes

Why was Kim Kardashian arrested at the airport?

She had two pounds of crack in her knickers.

What do you get if you cross a bee with a quarter of a pound of ground beef?

A humburger.

Fast Way Jokes More Fast Way Jokes

What's the fastest way to go from 300 pounds to 140?

Convert to kilograms.

What's the fastest way to heaven?

It depends on the flight delays.