What is the fastest way to lose pounds?

Leave EU.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Where'd the dog who lost his tail go to get a new one?

A retail store.

What is the best way to get called a,"genius?

By losing a billion dollars in business.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why has the ex-NSA contractor not left his house?

He's snowed in.

Why didn't the electron leave it's house?

Because it was grounded.

Eu Jokes More Eu Jokes

What's the difference between Hillary's e-mails and the UK leaving the EU?

Hillary got off Scott-free.

What is UK's favorite song line?

And I'll tell you all about it when I EU again.

Pound Jokes More Pound Jokes

How do dog catchers get paid?

By the Pound!

What do an anorexic girl and the UK have in common?

They both lose pounds really fast.

Fast Way Jokes More Fast Way Jokes

What's the fastest way to drive through Louisiana?

Drive the route with Les Miles!...

What's the fastest way to heaven?

It depends on the flight delays.