Eu Jokes

What do Star Wars and the United Kingdom have in common?

They both abandoned the EU

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What's the difference between Hillary's e-mails and the UK leaving the EU?

Hillary got off Scott-free.

What is UK's favorite song line?

And I'll tell you all about it when I EU again

Why did the EU start downloading random stuff to it's computer?

It had freed up one GB of space.

Whats the difference between English Breakfast and Irish Breakfast tea?

One is still in the EU.

How much space is left in EU?

1 GB

What did UK say while leaving?

It's not EU, it's me

Why can't you have Christmas dinner in the EU?

Because there is no Turkey

What is the fastest way to lose pounds?

Leave EU.

What's the best way to lose some pounds?

Leave the EU.

What have Disney and the U.K. got in common?

Both dropped the EU And screwed over a lot of people

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What did NATO say to the EU at the World Organization baseball game?

Europe!

What did GB say to EU?

Peace out, EUROn EUROwn!

What's better than having a 'Brexit' vote about Britain leaving the EU?

Not being British.

How much space does the EU have left?

1GB

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What did Abe Lincoln say after a three day drinking binge?

Wait I freed?!?!?

What did Abraham Lincoln say after a three-day drinking spree?

I freed the what?

Mail Jokes More Mail Jokes

What came in the mail today?

Anthrax.

Why couldn't the apple send an e-mail to the orange?

Because the lime was engaged.

Abandon Jokes More Abandon Jokes

What do Star Wars and the United Kingdom have in common?

They both abandoned the EU

What did the sign say on the abandoned nuclear reactor?

Gone fission

British Jokes More British Jokes

What do British girls do to hearts?

Brexit

What drove the British mystery fan insane?

He lost his Marples.

Turkey Jokes More Turkey Jokes

What happened when Turkey was accused of being Chicken?

It staged a coup

How do you know Putin is late for Thanks Giving?

He's Russian to Turkey.

Pound Jokes More Pound Jokes

What does a pound, a dollar and rumble have in common?

For a dollar you can get a pound of rubles.

How much does Nicki Minaj sell security devices for?

Pound an alarm

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a yogurt and the Americans?

If you leave a yogurt for 200 years it'll grow a culture.

What's the difference between CNN and Al Jazeera?

CNN shows the missiles taking off and Al Jazeera shows them landing.

Nato Jokes More Nato Jokes

What did NATO say to the EU at the World Organization baseball game?

Europe!

Why is NATO afraid of Russia?

Cause Russia's been Putin them on notice. Just thought of this.