What's the first thing a woman does after leaving spousal abuse therapy?

The dishes, if she knows what's good for her!

This joke may have profanity.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do I know Sarah's a vegetarian?

Because I've met herbivore.

What should TNT host?

League of Legends. Because they know drama.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why couldn't the NSA agent leave his house this Winter?

He was Snowden.

How do you get a person with podophobia to leave?

Just say "shoe".

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What is the last thing you want to hear after blowing Willie Nelson?

I'm not Willie Nelson' Credit: old joke via: Norm Macdonald

What's the last thing you want to hear when you're blowing Willie Nelson?

I'm not Willie Nelson.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What is the difference between a Mother and Wife?

One woman brings you into this world crying and the other ensures you continue to do so.

What do you say to a woman with one black eye?

Nothing, you've already told her.

Dish Jokes More Dish Jokes

What side dish do frogs like to enjoy with their hamburgers?

French Flies!

How Does Sean Connery Wash His Dishes?

Like a Bosch!