Dish Jokes

Where did L Ron Hubbard store his dishes?

In the L Ron cupboard.

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What did the Middle Eastern dishwasher say when his boss asked him what he did all day at work?

Iraq the dishes in the dish rack and Iran the dishwasher

Who's there? Dishes. Dishes who?

Dishes Sean Connery.

What do you get when you mix an octopus and a Mexican?

I don't know, but it sure can wash a lot of dishes.

What's the first thing a woman does after leaving spousal abuse therapy?

The dishes, if she knows what's good for her!

What's a dish best served cold?

Air condish.

What do you suppose Ray Rice's fiance' did when he got her home from knocking her out?

The dishes if she knows what's good for her!

What do you call a "to-go" dish ordered from German-Italian restaurant?

Alfredosehen

What was the rock band doing at the kitchen sink?

Moshing the dishes

How many honest intelligent caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?

Both of them.

Why is revenge a dish best served cold?

Because it's just-ice

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Why do petri dishes make good conversationalists?

They're cultured.

What kind of dish does LeBron like?

Anything with curry in it.

Where did the drug addict keep his food and dishes?

The potry

What's a terrible plate pun?

Dish one.

Whats the first thing a woman does when she gets to the battered shelter?

The dishes if she knows whats good for her.

Why is revenge a dish best served with honey?

Because honey is what you find at the end of bee trails (betrayals)

What do you need to have to do the dishes when you don't want to?

Dishcipline This is literally a joke I told in a dream and I remembered it when waking up.

What side dish do frogs like to enjoy with their hamburgers?

French Flies!

How Does Sean Connery Wash His Dishes?

Like a Bosch!

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What do plantains say when they lose their phone?

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What did the Puerto Rican dish say when he lost his Android?

Where'd mofongo?

Mix Jokes More Mix Jokes

What does a Canadian get by mixing black and white?

Greh.

What do you get when you mix alcohol with literature?

Tequila Mockingbird!

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What's black and white and makes a lot of noise?

A panda with a set of drums.

Why are ghosts always dehydrated?

They have a lot of boos but no water

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What's Jared's favorite ingredient for his Subway sandwiches?

Extra virgin oil

How did Jared lose 40 pounds?

He dumped his girlfriend

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

Why were there only 40,000 Mexicans at the Battle of the Alamo?

They only had 2 trucks

What did the black man say to the Mexican?

Hey. Watermelawn.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

What you gonna do on St. Valentine's Day?

What day is it " "Friday." "Shepherd's Pie."

How did Pinocchio figure out he was made of wood?

He was jacking off one day and his hand caught on fire.

Store Jokes More Store Jokes

What do you call a store that sells terribly made Nun apparel?

The Bad Habit.

Why is the Adults only store open 24hrs?

Because get off at different times.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do you do when you hear a woman got hit by a car?

Wonder how the hell a car got into the kitchen

What did Bob Marley say to his wife after he opened the fridge?

No, Woman, no pie.