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What would Michael Jackson be doing if he were alive right now?

Probably clawing at the inside of his coffin.

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Michael Jackson Jokes More Michael Jackson Jokes

Why does Michael Jackson like 26 year Olds?

Because there are twenty of them.

What do Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson have in common?

They both spent a fortune making their noses more white.

Claw Jokes More Claw Jokes

What did the cat use to sharpen its claws?

Me. Ow.

What's the difference between a semicolon and a cat?

One has a pause at the end of it's clause, the other has claws at the end of it's paws.

Inside Jokes More Inside Jokes

What's brown and furry on the outside, soft moist and tastes good on the inside, begins with "C" and ends with "T", and has a "U" and an "N" in it?

A coconut.

What is juicy on the inside, dry on the outside, and has "apple" in it?

A roasted baby with an apple in its mouth.

Coffin Jokes More Coffin Jokes

What would Ronald Reagan be doing if he were alive today?

He'd be scratching at the lid of his coffin yelling, "Let me out! I'm alive! Let me out!!"

Why does Dracula always travel with his coffin?

Because his life is at stake.