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Where did the universe attend college?

At the university.

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Attend Jokes More Attend Jokes

Why didn't the insomniac attend his uncle's funeral?

He's not a mourning person

Why did the rancher stop attending poker night with his marijuana smoking steers?

The steaks were getting too damn high.

College Jokes More College Jokes

What do you call Charlie Sheen's brother if he were a financial advisor?

Emilio Investevez. Fun game/running joke friends in college used to play. Wondering if Reddit would enjoy the game too.

What did the dad buffalo say when his offspring left for college?

Bison

Universe Jokes More Universe Jokes

How many physicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Two! one to change the light bulb and the other to rotate the universe!

What's the biggest lie of the Universe?

I Have Read and Agree to the Terms of Service.

University Jokes More University Jokes

How many OU (University of Oklahoma) coaches does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They aren't about to change a bulb when flipping a switch has worked for 15 years.

Where did Dr. Pepper get his degree?

The University of Minnesoda