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Which teachers make pupils feel good about themselves?

Maths teachers, they make everybody count.

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Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

What do vegetables watch when they're feeling frisky?

Cornography

Why did the dolphin feel crabby?

Because he ate too many crabs!

Count Jokes More Count Jokes

What's the difference between a 100 year old and a 4 year old?

What base you're counting in.

How many beers did you have while I was gone?

Me: Two. 4-year-old: It was nine. Teaching her to count was a mistake.

Teacher Jokes More Teacher Jokes

What are the four elements?

Pupil: Fire Earth Water and the Internet. Teacher: What do you mean the Internet Pupil: Well Mum says that whenever I'm on the Net I'm in my element.

What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train the other trains the mind.

Pupil Jokes More Pupil Jokes

What are pupils at ghost schools called?

Ghoulboys and ghoulgirls.

What are the four elements?

Pupil: Fire Earth Water and the Internet. Teacher: What do you mean the Internet Pupil: Well Mum says that whenever I'm on the Net I'm in my element.

Everybody Jokes More Everybody Jokes

Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?

Because everybody who can run, jump and swim are already in the U.S.

Why does it smell so bad in Russia?

Everybody loves Putin!