Why could the drunk man only move left?

The officer hadn't read him his rights.

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What do you call it when you go to the store just to use their dumbbells and then leave?

Shoplifting

What's the difference between America and a pot of yogurt?

If you leave a pot of yogurt alone for 200 years it develops a culture.

Right Jokes More Right Jokes

What gives a ghost the right to haunt people?

A haunting license

What did the blondes left leg say to her right?

Nothing... They've never met

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

What do animals read in zoos?

Gnus papers.

Where would an eccentric beverage go if it wanted to watch married couplesfight and read high quality humor columns?

To the Drink Quirks Wed Fight.

Officer Jokes More Officer Jokes

What did the Officer say after arresting the crooked cook?

I just booked a cook for cooking the books.

What's the hurry?

Me: Nothing officer - Just didn't want to slow you down. Cop: I was pulling you over. Me: Well I get that. Now.

Drunk Man Jokes More Drunk Man Jokes

Why could the drunk man only move left?

The officer hadn't read him his rights.

What 3 things that tell the truth?

Drunk men. Little children. Yoga pants.