Drunk Man Jokes

What 3 things that tell the truth?

Drunk men. Little children. Yoga pants.

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What did the pig say to the drunk man?

Licence and registration please.

Why could the drunk man only move left?

The officer hadn't read him his rights.

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Soccer Game Jokes More Soccer Game Jokes

How did the drunk Irish man lose 30$?

He bet 10$ on the soccer game and 20$ on the replay.

Why did the turkey get ejected from the soccer game?

He had tripped a fan.

20 Jokes More 20 Jokes

What's the best part of dating 29 year olds?

There's 20 of them. (More funny out loud)

What is H20 Made out of?

20 hydrogen atoms.

Irish Jokes More Irish Jokes

Why is an Irish funeral cheaper than an Irish wedding?

There's one less drunk.

What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?

One less drunk.

300 Jokes More 300 Jokes

How'd he do that?

Because you can't bowl a 300 and lose.

How did the drunk Irish man lose 30$?

He bet 10$ on the soccer game and 20$ on the replay.

10 Jokes More 10 Jokes

Why did Windows skip to 10?

Because 7 ate 9.

How much time do I have left, doctor?

Doctor: 10 Guy: 10 what! 10 days, 10 months, 10 years Doctor: 9...8...7...6...5...

Pig Jokes More Pig Jokes

What do you call a pig sitting on a hog?

Usually they prefer to be called "officer"

What do you call pigs in a demolition derby?

Crashing boars.

Registration Jokes More Registration Jokes

What does the 1286BC incribed on the mummy's tomb indicate?

The registration of the car that ran him over!

Why were you speeding when I stopped you?

Motorist: So I could race home to get my license and registration.

Right Jokes More Right Jokes

How many ears does Captain Kirk have?

Three... The one on the left The one on the right And of course, the Final Front Ear

What did the blondes left leg say to her right?

Nothing... They've never met