Why did the bed spread?

Because it saw the pillow slip.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

Why did the blond take a ruler to bed?

To see how long she slept.

Why do police officers sleep with two rocks near their bed?

With one he turns off the light, With the other he checks if the window is closed

Spread Jokes More Spread Jokes

What did Shakespeare spread on his toast?

Blue Sonnet

What do you call mints you can spread through social media?

Memementos

Slip Jokes More Slip Jokes

What does a bull do to stay warm on a cold day?

It goes into a barn and slips into a nice warm Jersey.

What do you get if you take your computer to an ice rink?

A slipped disk.

Pillow Jokes More Pillow Jokes

Why did the bed spread?

Because it saw the pillow slip.

What do you call it when... You put a pillow on a stool?

You call it a stool softener cheesiest joke I made up