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Why do hipsters only use the microwave?

Because they don't like conventional ovens.

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What's something that the inventor doesn't want, the buyer doesn't use, and the user doesn't know about it?

A casket

What kind of fabric does Mario use?

Denim denim denim.

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What would you like it to be?

A joke.

Why do ghosts like to ride elevators?

It lifts their spirits.

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What's black and taps on the window?

A baby in the microwave

What does a blonde do when her computer freezes?

She puts in in the microwave.

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Where do hipsters swim?

Not in the mainstream

Why did the hipster go to the gynecologist?

To get a Pabst smear.