Why do people ask "what the hell were you thinking"?

Obviously, I was thinking I was gonna get away with it and not have to explain it

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Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Why is your shirt on wrong?

Daughter: I think you old people call it: "second base"

Why did Snow White buy an android phone?

She thought the apple was poisoned.

Explain Jokes More Explain Jokes

How many judges does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one he holds it still and the whole world revolves around him. Just one but two lawyers have to explain him how to do it.

What did the String Theorist say when his wife caught him in bed with another woman?

Wait, I can explain everything!

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why do they have fences around a cemetery?

Because people are dying to get in.

What is the difference between Digg and Reddit?

People can Voat.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Why are you always tired, Dad?

My 3-year-old asked as she woke me from a nap by poking me in the eye.

What do you do when your Apple device gets warm?

Ask apple to open the backdoor.

Hell Jokes More Hell Jokes

Why are you home so early?

Me: My boss told me to go to hell

What would you folks like?

HER: I'll have the s- ME: WHO THE HELL IS THIS GUY!