Why do people ask "what the hell were you thinking"?

Obviously, I was thinking I was gonna get away with it and not have to explain it

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Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What does a dyslexic,agnostic and insomniac spend most of his time doing?

Staying up all night thinking if there really is a dog

What do you think of my tweets?

Wife: They're all pretty terrible. Me: Don't you have ANYTHING positive to say Wife: You're consistent.

Explain Jokes More Explain Jokes

What dies a little, when explained about?

A joke.

What did Peyton Manning said to his younger brother about the new NFL rule?

ELI5 (explain me like I am five)

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why should you never hit people with violins?

Because violins is not the answer...

What's the difference.... Between my girlfriend and santa?

Some people actually believe santa exist.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What do call an old man that asks questions?

Pop Quiz

What did Shakespeare say when asked how his wife keeps things interesting?

Anne hath a way.

Hell Jokes More Hell Jokes

How do you make holy water?

Boil the hell out of it.

Why There is No Readhead in Hell?

God does not punish twice.