How do you tell the difference between ...

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

How do you tell the difference between Al Gore and the secret service when they're in the same room?

Al Gore's the stiff one.

Why did the minus sign run for office?

To make a difference.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What does Brock say?

Ash told me you were in here and I should take a Pikachu. I'm sorry...

Why did Princess Diana divorce Prince Charles?

She was always told a ruler was 12 inches!

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did one ovary say to the other one?

Did you order any furniture?" "No. Why?" asked the other. "Cause there's two nuts out there trying to deliver an organ."

How do you spell elephant?

E-l-l-e-e-f-a-n-t "That's not how the dictionary spells it" "You didn't ask me how the dictionary spelt it!"

Karma Jokes More Karma Jokes

What did Reddit say to his elderly mother when he tried to take her to a home?

Get in the Karma.

What does Apu say when people leave him to browse reddit?

Thank you, Karma gain

Chemist Jokes More Chemist Jokes

What does a chemist say when he's pouring water into an acid?

Drop the base.

How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

Ask them to say the word, "unionized".

Plumber Jokes More Plumber Jokes

How can you determine which of two people is a chemist and which is a plumber?

You ask them to pronounce unionize.

Why did you jump on a turtle?

Me: Because I'm a plumber

20 Jokes More 20 Jokes

Why does Mommy always say no?

Well Son, if Mommy said yes all the time you'd have 20 more siblings.

What do you get if you put 20 blondes in a row standing ear to ear?

A wind tunnel.

Remain Jokes More Remain Jokes

What do you call a poo which still remains after flushing?

An - nflushable loating bject

What do you call a body in a morgue which hasn't been viewed by anyone yet?

Remains to be seen.

3000 Jokes More 3000 Jokes

Why were there only 3,000 Mexicans at The Alamo?

They only had 4 cars.

What did David Crockett say when he looked over the Alamo wall and saw 3000 Mexicans?

Hey I didn't know we were pouring concrete today.

Himher Jokes More Himher Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a plumber and a chemist?

Ask him/her to pronounce unionized

How many Man U. fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

One to change the lightbulb and one to drive down to Kent to pick him/her up.