Why is the food so cold and bland?

Dad: Because your mother put her heart and soul into it.

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Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What is a better name for cows?

Lawn mooers! My 12 year old sister made this up... She out dad joked me..and I'm a dad!

How can you tell when Halloween is coming too soon?

The sight of premature Ejack-o-lanterns in the neighborhood. I'm a Dad so this joke is OK

Heart Jokes More Heart Jokes

Why did the heart get sent to police station?

Cardiac arrest.

How do you know when a liberal is really dead?

His heart stops bleeding.

Soul Jokes More Soul Jokes

What's the difference between a woman coming out of church and a woman taking a bath?

The woman coming out of church as hope in her soul!

What the difference between a nun in a bathtub & a nurse in the bathtub?

One has soul full of hope & one has a hole full of soap... I'll walk myself out, sorry first post here

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

Why couldn't the Buddhist monk send his mother a birthday card via email?

He had no attachments.

What day do most mothers give birth?

Labor day.

Food Jokes More Food Jokes

What take out food should you avoid at all costs in Hospital?

Donor Kebab

What's "saying grace?

Me: It's when we thank the one who provided our food. 4-year-old: We thank the microwave