Why should you avoid people dressed as celery?

They could be stalking you!

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People Jokes More People Jokes

What's the difference between a baby and a salad?

Most people don't get angry when you toss a salad.

Why do polish people all have ski at the end of their name?

Because they can't spell toboggan.

Dress Jokes More Dress Jokes

Why did the lettuce blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing

What do you call someone who likes to dress up like Jesus?

A cross-dresser.

Avoid Jokes More Avoid Jokes

Why did the two chickens cross the road?

To avoid debating Bernie Sanders

How do you get a hipster to take a shower?

Give them a leaky showerhead. You know, so they can avoid the main stream.

Stalk Jokes More Stalk Jokes

Who are all these people Twitter wants me to follow?

Has the fail whale been stalking me. Help, stranger danger!

Why did the plant cross the road?

Cus it was being stalked!

Celery Jokes More Celery Jokes

What looks like celery, tastes like celery, but isnt celery?

Artificial celery

What are they gonna do?

Ask you to extinguish your celery Doubtful.