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Why was the detective excited when he found a thimble sized crown?

He was looking for Finger Prince. (Say it out loud if you don't get it.)

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Why didn't they tell Chris Christie they took his pony away?

He would've found it hard to digest.

What's long, straight, and found between a pair of legs?

The hypotenuse.

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What did the NSA agent say when the blizzard hit?

Looks like we're snowed in.

Why do you look surprised in all your selfies?

Didn't you know you were taking the picture

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What did the tiger say to the detective?

I'm not lion. Ill be here all week...

What is a Detective's favourite pastry?

The Tooth Hurts Donut!

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Why do Redditors get excited when a tornado rips down miles of fences?

Because there is a lot of reposting to do.

Why did the blonde get excited after finishing her puzzle in 6 months?

The box said 2-4 years!