Clear Jokes

What did the Shetland Pony say when asked if his cough had cleared up?

Yes, thanks, but I'm still a little horse.

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How do you clear a traffic jam at a banker convention?

With a plunger.

What did I say when my Neutrogena products worked?

Well I'm glad I've gotten that cleared up

What was the first reference to pole vaulting in the Bible?

When Jesus cleared the temple.

What did the hotel manager say to the elephant that couldn't pay his bill?

Pack your trunk and clear out!

What do you call the process of a robot clearing its artificial nose?

An olfactory reset.

Who are the fastest readers on earth?

9/11 victims.... They can clear 10 stories in 5 seconds.

What happens when the fog clears in California?

UCLA

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Window Jokes More Window Jokes

What is it with people who text and drive?

I swear to god the next time I see this happen, I'll roll down my window and throw my beer at them.

Why is Microsoft coming out with a windows 10 instead of 9?

Because 7 8 9

Chloroform Jokes More Chloroform Jokes

Psychiatrist Jokes More Psychiatrist Jokes

Why did the magnet go to the psychiatrist?

He was bipolar.

What's the difference between a psychiatrist and his patients at the mental hospital?

The patients are the ones that get better and get to go home.

Red Paint Jokes More Red Paint Jokes

What's red and smells like white paint?

Red paint.

What's red and smells like yellow paint?

Red paint

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

When's the best time to take your doberman pinscher for a walk?

Anytime he wants to go.

How many performance artists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I don't know either, I walked out early too.

Traffic Jam Jokes More Traffic Jam Jokes

Why did the girl smear peanut butter on the road?

To go with the traffic jam.

What's big and hairy and goes 'beep beep'?

A monster in a traffic jam.

Shill Jokes More Shill Jokes

Why is it bad that Peyton Manning shilled for Budweiser?

Because he clearly owed the win to Miller.

What is the new coin called?

A Shilling, of course.

Plastic Wrap Jokes More Plastic Wrap Jokes

What did the Psychiatrist say to the man who walked in wearing nothing but plastic wrap?

I can clearly see ur nuts.