Straight Razor Jokes

What is the hardest part of cutting a baby in half with a straight razor?

My erection.

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Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What is the hardest part of cuting a baby in half with a straight razor?

My erection.

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Erection Jokes More Erection Jokes

Why do asians got to the hospital after voting?

Everyone knows that you should see a doctor for an erection that last longer than 4 hours.

What do Asians do during an erection?

They vote

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

How does a barber make phone calls?

He cuts them short.

What's long and black and dangerous to cut into?

The KFC Drive-thru line.

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

What did the Japan team say after the first half of the Women's World Cup?

I, 4-1, know we won't win.

What would you rather have Parkinson's or Alzheimer's?

At least with Parkinson's you have half a pint.

Hard Jokes More Hard Jokes

What's the hardest part about making a manicure joke?

You really have to nail it

What's the hardest part breaking up with a Japanese girlfriend?

You have to drop the bomb on her twice before she gets it.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What did the mother snake say to her crying baby?

Stop crying and viper your nose!

Why are we at the vet?

Me: So our pig can't have babies 6: How do you know she doesn't want babies Me:*looks at my kids* Just a hunch