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Tv Remote Jokes

Where did all the TV remotes go when you can't find them?

To a remote island...

Love Card

Love Card

What do Libyan people put in their TV remotes?

Tripoli batteries.

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Remote Jokes More Remote Jokes

Why did the T.V. break up with the remote?

She thought he was too controlling.

What's the difference between a tv remote and a newborn?

You can't play football with the remote.

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer?

He couldn't see himself doing it

What's a pirate's favorite thing about turning 65?

AArrrRP

Belong Jokes More Belong Jokes

What do you tell someone who feels that life has shorted them from a purpose or calling?

You belong.

What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you?

NA'CHO CHEESE

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Why doctor?

Doctor: "Because I'm trying to talk to you, and it's very distracting."

Why is it so hard for an eighty year old woman to pee in the morning?

Have you ever tried pulling apart a grilled cheese?!

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What Do You Call Adrian Peterson Playing Baseball?

A switch hitter.

What kind of music can't Ed Sheeran play?

Soul

Tv Jokes More Tv Jokes

Why cant you watch TV in Afghanistan?

Because of the tele-ban.

Why are there commentators for televised sports?

We can figure out what's going on live, but can't while watching it on tv

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a garbanzo beans and a chickpea?

I would never let a garbanzo bean in my mouth.

What's the difference between math and meth?

One of them ruins your life. The other's just meth.

Remote Control Jokes More Remote Control Jokes

What did the tv say to the remote control?

You turn me on

Who do you pat with encouragement when they fail to work?

A Remote control