Newborn Jokes

What do you call a newborn with 3 arms?

Not mine

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

How do Chinese pick a name for their newborn?

They kick a Can

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Theirs Jokes More Theirs Jokes

Why did the watermelon and the honeydew decide to cancel their spontaneous wedding in Las Vegas?

They realized with a family like theirs, they really Cantaloupe.

How can you tell when you are talking to an extroverted engineer?

They look at your feet instead of theirs.

Product Jokes More Product Jokes

What did Bill Gates say to Steve Jobs?

Your products are fruity.

Why did I break up with my vegan girlfriend?

She refused to swallow animal by-products.

Fuss Jokes More Fuss Jokes

Whats all of this fuss about reposts?

I haven't seem any all year! (It's 12:00 NZST)

Describe Jokes More Describe Jokes

How do you describe a Swede, who's not really a Swede?

Swed-ish.

How would you describe yourself?

Me: Verbally. But I've also prepared a dance.

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

Who holds up stagecoaches and steals laptop computers?

Click Turpin

How many Bernie supporters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One to hold the lightbulb, and the rest of the world to revolve around them

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

What did the Chinese man say when he found out his mother died?

I can't bereave it!

Why does a mother carry her baby?

The baby can't carry the mother.

Export Jokes More Export Jokes

What do you call it when two designers argue about what file type to export a graphic to?

Getting into a bit of a.tiff!

Why doesn't Sweden export it's cattle?

It wants to keep it's Stockholm!

Fireman Jokes More Fireman Jokes

What did the fireman say when he noticed his hammer was on fire?

This is not a drill.

What do you do if you see a fireman?

You put it out, man!