Newborn Jokes

What do you call a newborn with 3 arms?

Not mine

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

How do Chinese pick a name for their newborn?

They kick a Can

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Heroin Jokes More Heroin Jokes

What's the difference between the Red Hot Chili Peppers and Harriet Tubman?

Harriet Tubman was a heroine to the slaves, but the Red Hot Chili Peppers were slaves to heroin.

What did the dealer say to Ted when he caught him stealing heroin?

Your addicted.

Fisherman Jokes More Fisherman Jokes

Why did the fisherman drill a hole in the ice?

For the Halibut

What do you call a fishermans newborn?

Fresh bait

Product Jokes More Product Jokes

What products do I use for grooming?

She was a bit taken aback when I replied, "Facebook."

What did 2 say to 3 about 6?

Oh don't mind him, he's just the product of our times!

Feed Jokes More Feed Jokes

What did Christa McAuliffe say to her husband right before she got on the Challenger Shuttle?

Honey you feed the dog I'll feed the fish.

How do you get money out of a piggy bank?

Feed it laxatives.

Empire State Building Jokes More Empire State Building Jokes

What do you get when you drop an egg off the Empire State Building?

New Yolk

What's the difference between negligence and falling off of the Empire State building?

Nothing if you're a gorilla.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What musical instrument do people with STDs play?

The herpsichord.

What's the difference between rock and jazz?

Rock is playing three chords for a thousand people. Jazz is playing a thousand chords for three people.

Tv Remote Jokes More Tv Remote Jokes

Where did all the TV remotes go when you can't find them?

To a remote island...

What do Libyan people put in their TV remotes?

Tripoli batteries.

3 Arm Jokes More 3 Arm Jokes

What do you call a newborn with 3 arms?

Not mine

What has 3 arms, 1 hat, 2 shirts, 1 jacket, 1 scarf, 1 gun, and 4 ears?

The Tchernobyl cowboy.