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How do you get a 300 pound woman into bed?

Piece of cake

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

Why did the spy stay in bed?

To stay under cover

What drives you?

Me: The bus mostly Interviewer: I mean what motivates you to get out of bed in the morning M: missing the bus

Piece Jokes More Piece Jokes

What's so lame about a duck President?

Pieces of bread, quacking, getting into all types of duck antics in the Oval Office! I'm game!

What do you call a piece of sandpaper in Syria?

A map.

Cake Jokes More Cake Jokes

What did the cake say to the Pie?

That's sweet, ain't it?

Who's there! Bacon! Bacon who?

Bacon a cake for your birthday!

300 Pound Jokes More 300 Pound Jokes

How do you get a 300 pound woman into bed?

Piece of cake

What's the fastest way to go from 300 pounds to 140?

Convert to kilograms.