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How do you know if someone is a vegan or has run a marathon?

They'll tell you

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do you get if you cross a Rottweiller and a hyena?

I don't know but I'll join in if it laughs!

How many house flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just the standard two, but I'll be damned if I know how they got in there.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did the doctor tell a welder when the welder asked if his girlfriend(a pilot) using alternative lube was giving him erectile dysfunction?

Jet fuel can't melt steel beams

What Did Superman Tell Superwoman?

Do you want to be in my Crib Tonight (Kryptonite)

Vegan Jokes More Vegan Jokes

How do you identify a vegan?

Listen closely.

What do vegan zombies say?

GRAAAAAAINS!

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What did the sea say to the river?

You can run but you can't tide!

What do you call Batman when he runs out of church?

Christian bale

Marathon Jokes More Marathon Jokes

Why does someone who runs marathons make a good student?

Because education pays off in the long run!

How do you know if someone is a vegan or has run a marathon?

They'll tell you