How do you know when you are a drug addict?

When you realize that you have had 2 strepsils within one hour.

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2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. 1 to hold the bulb 2 to turn the ladder and 17 to be on the guest list.

Why does Euler's Number say it's "going number 2" when it pees?

Because its natural log is 1.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What did off-center say to tilted?

I don't know either he told me to askew!

How many times do I have to tell you this Mom?

I have thousands of fans who need to know my thoughts. So, no I can't take out the garbage.

Hour Jokes More Hour Jokes

How do you make a buff guy talk to you for hours?

Ask about his routine.

What is that new movie about?

About an hour

Realize Jokes More Realize Jokes

What's WRONG with me?

I named 6 things before I realized it was a rhetorical question.

What do you have when you just used the toilet and realized there's no toilet paper?

A real mess on your hands.

Drug Addict Jokes More Drug Addict Jokes

What do you call a duck that's a drug addict?

A quack-head.

What do you call a drug addict who has been awake for 14 days straight?

A "two-weeker"