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How does Santa Claus remember which chimneys he's been down?

He keeps a log

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Santa Claus Jokes More Santa Claus Jokes

What nationality is Santa Claus?

North Polish.

How do you know when Santa Claus is nearby?

You can feel his presents...

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

How did God make Himself?

I have to remember to start getting high before bedtime.

Why has no one invented a device where I can move myself around from place to place while lying in a hammock?

I remember when we used to make stuff in this lazy country!

Log Jokes More Log Jokes

What is something you can use to find the pH of tree sap?

A log!

What will you find in the toilet of a ship?

The captains log.

Chimney Jokes More Chimney Jokes

What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?

Claustrophobia!

What is the best evidence that Microsoft has a monopoly?

Santa Claus had to switch from Chimneys to Windows.