How many Heisenbergs does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

If you know the number, you don't know where the socket is.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do you like to do in your free time?

Guy: I spy on people. Girl: Really I like to take long walks in the park and go to the movies with my friends. Guy: I know.

Where do I see myself in ten years?

I don't know. Let me think. *pictures self riding jet ski made of bones through space*

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many monastic women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None... they live an ascetic lifestyle and prefer to not use electricity.

How many bass players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One. Five. One.

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many "friend zoned" guys does it take to change a lightbulb?

How many "friend zoned" guys does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just compliment it and get mad when it won't screw.

How many religious women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Nun.

Number Jokes More Number Jokes

What's the current number one song in Russia?

Crimea river

How many Sandpeople does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

You never can tell. The Sandpeople always ride in single file to hide their numbers.

Socket Jokes More Socket Jokes

How does a Narcissist change a lightbulb?

He holds it up to the socket and the world revolves around him.

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One. They stick the bulb in the socket and wait for the world to revolve around them!