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What am I a pillow now?

Her: Yep, and pillows don't talk. I think we're bonding.

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Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Why was the mother flea feeling down in the dumps?

Because she thought her children were all going to the dogs.

Why do molluscs only think of themselves?

Because they're shellfish

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

Why do hamburgers make poor pigeons?

They won't talk no matter how you grill them!

What do prisoners used to talk to each other in jail?

Cell Phones.

Pillow Jokes More Pillow Jokes

What do they leave on your pillow at a bordello in Dijon, France?

Condom-Mints

How did the dinosaur feel after he ate a pillow?

Down in the mouth!

Bond Jokes More Bond Jokes

Why did the robot cross the road?

Because it was carbon bonded to the chicken.

What's that jabbing me in the gluteus maximus?

Bond: my PPK Money Penny: 'K

Yep Jokes More Yep Jokes

What's the capital of Ohio?

Son: ... Me: It's also a famous explorer. Son: Dora Me: Yep. Dora, Ohio.

Why is 9 crying?

Me: Because it's raining and he's getting wet wife: But we're at a water park me *takes a drink from my flask* Yep