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What did the one electron say to the other when it asked it out on a date?

Get outta here, I'm not attracted to you!

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When a waitress asks me if I want soup or salad, I always ask "who's in charge of tossing the salads here?

Then I frown & order the soup.

What is it called when you ride around on a horse asking people questions?

A gallop poll.

Electron Jokes More Electron Jokes

What did Ronald Reagan say in his presidential campaign?

Electron. Also, what did the Greek warrior say when he saw the wooden horse Hydrogen please spare me

Why did the electron go to jail?

He was charged with battery!

Date Jokes More Date Jokes

How can people get engaged after dating less than a year?

You haven't seen their fall wardrobe yet and tbh it could be a deal breaker

Why did Jesus take three days to resurrect after dying on the cross?

Because the date wasn't nailed down.

Attract Jokes More Attract Jokes

Why did the Polish person marry someone from the other side of the country?

Because opposite poles attract

Why do people buy smart cars?

Because opposites attract.

Outta Jokes More Outta Jokes

What did the bartender say to the gold when the gold walked into a bar?

AU, get outta here!

How do you like it?

Me: Salty...of course *slaps down $20 CG: We'll take two pretzels with salt Get outta the gutter pervs