Electron Jokes

Which element is most likely to surrender an electron?

Francium.

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What's a homotron?

Just an electron that goes around looking for a fuse to blow!

How do you turn a seal into a sea lion?

Remove an electron.

How many electrons does a negatively charged oxygen atom have?

Nion

How do you make a Sea Lion?

You remove an electron from a Seal!

What's the difference between a seal and a sealion?

An electron

Why did the electron go to jail?

He was charged with battery!

What is the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

An electron

Why was the electron mad?

Well, it doesn't really matter...

What did the nucleus say to get the electron up?

Up and atom!

What did one atom say to the other?

I lost an electron..." The other atom asks "Are you sure " First atom replies, "I'm positive!"

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What did Ronald Reagan say in his presidential campaign?

Electron. Also, what did the Greek warrior say when he saw the wooden horse Hydrogen please spare me

What did the one electron say to the other when it asked it out on a date?

Get outta here, I'm not attracted to you!

What does electron and proton say when they go to war?

Chaaaarge!!

What does the electron say to the resistor?

Ohm my god you're impeding me. *initiate knee slap

Why didn't the electron leave it's house?

Because it was grounded.

What's the difference between a seal and sea lion?

One electron

What did the atom say when it lost an electron?

I better keep an ion that.

Never take advice from electrons.

They are always negative.

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Drain Jokes More Drain Jokes

What did the fish say to the man draining its aquarium?

WATER YOU DOING

Why are dyslexic zombies such good plumbers?

Because they're always looking for drains.

Presidential Campaign Jokes More Presidential Campaign Jokes

What Did Chris Christie Give Up For Lent?

The US Presidential Campaign!

What did Ronald Reagan say in his presidential campaign?

Electron. Also, what did the Greek warrior say when he saw the wooden horse Hydrogen please spare me

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What did Matthew McConaughey yell at the drive that was about to miss his turn?

A right a right a right!

Why do police officers sleep with two rocks near their bed?

With one he turns off the light, With the other he checks if the window is closed

Fuse Jokes More Fuse Jokes

What did the fuse say when it blew out?

Sorry, I couldn't resist.

What's a homotron?

Just an electron that goes around looking for a fuse to blow!

Sealion Jokes More Sealion Jokes

What's the difference between a seal and a sealion?

An electron

What does Tupperware and a sealion have in common?

They both like a tight seal.

Battery Jokes More Battery Jokes

What's the difference between a feminist and a battery?

Batteries have a positive side! inspired by: http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/2zlrot/howmanyfeministsdoesittaketochangea/

Why did the electron go to jail?

He was charged with battery!

Element Jokes More Element Jokes

Why do we all marry?

Because romance is not the only element of life, we should also know horror, terror, suspense, irony, stupidity and tragedy of life!

What element can combine with two nitrogens and an oxygen, and still have there be only one element?

XeNON.

Atom Jokes More Atom Jokes

Why are atoms so serious?

Because they're no laughing matter.

What did the atom say to the other atom?

Let's bond!