Spill Jokes

What's it called when you make sure you don't spill the wine?

Being carafe-ful.

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What's the phrase for when a bird spills a drink?

Party fowl.

Why when you spill red wine on a carpet do you take the stain out with white wine?

Because more alcohol is the solution to all problems.

Whats the first thing you do when you spill something on your keyboard?

Try to disable sticky keys.

Why don't they make bouncy houses for adults?

You'd spill your drink.

What happened to the hippy chemistry teacher when he spilled his chemicals?

He tripped on acid

Why did I spill root beer on a DNS server?

Just because ICANN.

What do we call of spill of the world's most abundant resource?

A sunny day.

What did the spilled noodles say to the sauce pan?

I'm floored!

What did the sea-world trainer's friend say to him after he spilled water on his friends lap?

You did that on porpoise

What does the DJ do when he spills acid?

He drops the base!

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Why did the Green Giant get a new lid?

Because he always spills the beans.

What does Monsieur Homer say after spilling water on himself?

D'EAU!

Why did you dump those vegetables on my desk?

Criminal: You said it was time to spill the beans.

What's the difference between a violin and a fiddle?

You can spill your beer on a fiddle.

Why was the Dalai Lama not upset after he spilled spaghetti sauce?

Because it happened in the *past*a.

Why did the egg spill his guts at an AA meeting?

He was addicted to crack.

Why can you never trust a clumsy barista?

Because she's always spilling the beans!

What did the pope say when he spilled the sacramental wine?

Do we have any papal towels

What do you call it when you spill your morning drive-through beverage on your virus scan software?

Getting McCafe on McAfee

Why can you trust a coffee roaster?

Because he never spills the beans

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To trip ants.

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What's a mathematicians worst nightmare?

An EULer spill

Why did the woman take a load of hay to bed?

To feed her nightmare.

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How are you supposed to buy a gift for your mom as an adult?

It's like, oh you gave birth to me Please enjoy this fancy candle.

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Some adults like lawyers.

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What made the New Mexican sad?

He was out of meth.

What do you call a group of IT guys that smoke meth?

Geek Squad

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How do you exorcise a demon?

Make him run a lap then do 10 push-ups and sit-ups

How many countries' flags make an appearance at every auto race in the world?

Two. Libya's to start the race, and France's to signal there's one lap to go.

Disable Jokes More Disable Jokes

Why are all castles disabled?

They all have tur-rets

Whats the first thing you do when you spill something on your keyboard?

Try to disable sticky keys.

Floor Jokes More Floor Jokes

Why does Helium go up?

Because the floors Argon.

What is something that can breakdance on the floor only once on their life?

A fish

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when you drink food colouring?

You dye a little on the inside.

What happened when Apple added the new touchbar?

They're taking away functions, and there's no escape.