Attract Jokes

Why are TV's attracted to people?

Because we turn them on. / /

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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How can you attract a group of like minded friends?

This clique bait will shock you!

What are peas attracted to?

Chickpeas

Why was the monkey attracted to the paint?

Cuz it was yellow and appealing! Sorry if this is bad. Seen too many of the same jokes here and I wanted to add an original joke.

Why do people buy smart cars?

Because opposites attract.

Why do people love their smartphones so much?

Because opposites attract. (Told to me by 2 students today, loved it!)

Why did the Polish person marry someone from the other side of the country?

Because opposite poles attract

Why were the Persians attracted to the Anatolian Greeks?

Because they were Ionic.

What did the one electron say to the other when it asked it out on a date?

Get outta here, I'm not attracted to you!

Why do men like smart women?

A. Opposites attract.

What attracted you to our company?

Well, I heard you pay money in exchange for work

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Where's my Spiderman costume?

I want to wear it to the science museum "In your closet, why " 9: DUH. To attract radioactive spiders!

Why were all the ladies attracted to Jesus?

Because he was hung like this. (Hold your arms out wide)

Why are all the ladies attracted to Voldemort?

Because of his hex appeal.

How did the Royal Navy attract so many recruits?

They were impressive!

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What does a man call a gorilla he loves?

Haram Bae

What do you call an attractive primate corpse in Saudi Arabia?

Haram bae

Mickey Mouse Jokes More Mickey Mouse Jokes

Why did Mickey Mouse name his dog Pluto?

Because he's not a planet.

What does Mickey Mouse do to Minnie Mouse after she drowns and he pulls her out of the water?

Mouse to Mouse resuscitation.

Mummy Jokes More Mummy Jokes

Why doesn't Superman like the Mummy?

Because the Mummy's always saying, "I'll be in the crypt tonight."

What did the mummy snake say to the crying baby snake?

Stop crying and viper your nose.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

Why is PBS asking me for money?

If I had money I wouldn't need to pretend crow migration habits are good entertainment.

What's the smallest amount of money you would reach into a toilet to get?

Mine is a skittle.

Group Jokes More Group Jokes

What do you call an elevator with a group of slim, softly spoken, intelligent people inside?

A Lift (only a joke, my American friends)

What do you call a group of poor homeless people that show up to a party?

Party paupers

Skeleton Jokes More Skeleton Jokes

Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?

Because he had no guts.

How do skeletons reproduce?

They don't.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

How do cats buy things?

From a cat-alogue!

What was the last thing a blonde heard before dying of old age?

"Today children we will learn our ABC's"

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

What does a cat say when you tread on its tail?

ME-OW! I am very sorry. Just thought of it and felt like everyone should hear it. Maybe some jokes are better left untold...

What form of humor is nonexistent in black culture?

Dad jokes