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What do I look for in a car?

A sound-proof cabin so I can sing every rap lyric regardless of the neighborhood I'm driving through.

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Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What do you call the action where a dead guy falls out of a car and you have to put him back in?

A rehearsal

What did the car said to the valet?

I've been through a lot.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What was the Walrus doing in the Tupperware store?

Looking for the tight seal

How do you spot a sumo at a feminist rally?

Look for the one with shaved legs....

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

Why did nVidia built the first self-driving car?

On all conditions) Because their drivers keep crashing.

How come a man driving a train got struck by lightning?

He was a good conductor.

Sing Jokes More Sing Jokes

What song do pigs sing on New Year's Eve?

Auld Lang Swine.

What song do burgers sing on the job?

Gristle While You Work!

Neighborhood Jokes More Neighborhood Jokes

Why was the topologist confident about performing a vasectomy?

Because open balls are in his neighborhood

How do you know a neighborhood is too ghetto to film in?

If most people leave before shooting starts.