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What do I look for in a car?

A sound-proof cabin so I can sing every rap lyric regardless of the neighborhood I'm driving through.

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Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What do you get if you cross a dog with a sniper rifle and a car?

A!

When is a car, not a car?

When it turns into a driveway.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why was the tallest man in the world troubled?

Because he had no one to look up to.

Why does Mom wear makeup?

Me: To look pretty. 5: But she's already pretty. Me: Aww. 5: Dad, you should wear makeup.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

When a dad drives past a graveyard: Did you know that's a popular cemetery?

Yep, people are just dying to get in there

How do you ask an Uber driver if he drives for Lyft, too?

Do you even Lyft bro?

Sing Jokes More Sing Jokes

What song should you sing to a wildebeest on his birthday?

Happy Birthday To Gnu!

What's blue and sings alone?

Dan Ackroyd.

Neighborhood Jokes More Neighborhood Jokes

How can you tell a blonde is being unfaithful?

Everybody in the neighborhood is going to the pharmacy for penicillin.

Why was the topologist confident about performing a vasectomy?

Because open balls are in his neighborhood