Neighborhood Jokes

How do you know a neighborhood is too ghetto to film in?

If most people leave before shooting starts.

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What do you call a group of Spanish-speaking moms who band together to protect their neighborhood?

Super Barrio Mothers

How can you tell when Halloween is coming too soon?

The sight of premature Ejack-o-lanterns in the neighborhood. I'm a Dad so this joke is OK

What did the hipster say when a Starbucks opened in his neighborhood?

You can't gentrify this place! I just moved here!

How can you tell a blonde is being unfaithful?

Everybody in the neighborhood is going to the pharmacy for penicillin.

What do I look for in a car?

A sound-proof cabin so I can sing every rap lyric regardless of the neighborhood I'm driving through.

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Doorstep Jokes More Doorstep Jokes

How do you get a Harvard graduate off your doorstep?

Tip him for the pizza.

How do you get a drummer off your doorstep?

You pay for the pizza.

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What does a Pokemon baby say to his dad in Star Wars?

Waba Fett

What's going on?

Me: The kids gave me this *holds up Dad Is #1 mug* W: That's sweet H: Sweet They think I'm pee!

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

What's the difference between England and a tea bag?

A tea bag stays in the cup longer!

What's the difference between England and an egg cup?

An egg can stay in the cup longer

Group Jokes More Group Jokes

What do you call a group of Spanish-speaking moms who band together to protect their neighborhood?

Super Barrio Mothers

What did the group of young deer do with the broken jukebox?

They fixed it because their the fawns

Speak Jokes More Speak Jokes

What did the cat... Say to the person?

Nothing, because cats don't speak.

Why is being a politician more difficult than being a ventriloquist?

Ventriloquists have to be able to speak with their mouths closed. Politicians speak out of both sides of their mouths simultaneously.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a Dutch oven and a German one?

The type of gas used.

What's the difference between Kanye West, an American College student, and a homeless man?

The homeless man has $7 to his name.

Sight Jokes More Sight Jokes

Why do so many guys spit in urinals?

Just seems weird that there are that many dudes who salivate at the sight of a wiener.

Why did the girl walk past her crush twice?

He didn't believe in love at first sight.

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What does a blonde and a tornado have in common?

They both start blowing but in the end they take everything from you.

What has ten letters and starts with gas?

Flatulence