Neighborhood Jokes

Why are school shooters more likely to be white people?

White people actually go to school. Black people stay home and shoot people in their own neighborhood.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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How do you know a neighborhood is too ghetto to film in?

If most people leave before shooting starts.

How can you tell when the Mexicans have moved into your neighborhood?

The Blacks get car insurance.

What do you call a group of Spanish-speaking moms who band together to protect their neighborhood?

Super Barrio Mothers

Why was the topologist confident about performing a vasectomy?

Because open balls are in his neighborhood

How can you tell when Halloween is coming too soon?

The sight of premature Ejack-o-lanterns in the neighborhood. I'm a Dad so this joke is OK

What's your favorite adult-themed Halloween joke?

My favorite is: "There's a maniac living in our neighborhood. He goes house-to-house leaving severed body parts on the doorstep. He gives me the willies."

What's the difference between a hipster and a fire hose?

It takes more than one hipster to push the black people out of a neighborhood.

What do tornados and black people have in common?

It only takes one to ruin a neighborhood

What does a black man and a tornado have in common?

It only takes one to ruin a neighborhood.

What do you call the neighborhood where all the poor Italians live?

The spaghetto.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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How are black people similar to tornadoes?

They both only take one to ruin a neighborhood.

What did the hipster say when a starbucks opened in his neighborhood?

You can't gentrify this place! I just moved here!

How can you tell a blonde is being unfaithful?

Everybody in the neighborhood is going to the pharmacy for penicillin.

What do black people and a tornado have in common?

It only takes one to ruin a neighborhood.

What do a tornado and a black man have in common?

They both can ruin a neighborhood.

What do I look for in a car?

A sound-proof cabin so I can sing every rap lyric regardless of the neighborhood I'm driving through.

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Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

What does a dentist do in his free time?

Shoot lions.

Who Shot First? Boba Fett or Jango Fett?

Han Solo

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know Satan's barbeque ribs are good?

Cos they're trident tested. #noapologies

How do you know you're getting old?

When you exit a museum, you trigger the alarm.

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How does Times Square start the new year?

By having Mariah Carey drop the ball! "The audience can sing this one."

Why are Boy Scouts safest when travelling with a senior?

They'll always have dry wood on hand to start a fire

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

What do you get when you cross a Mexican cholo and an ill tempered Irishman?

A surprisingly stable person according to my Homie O'Statis.

What did the mexican boy say to his mom after he mopped the floors and found his brother?

I've cleaned up and found Jesus.

Film Jokes More Film Jokes

What if animals "were" injured in the making of a film. Do they list that in the credits?

Tim hurt one monkey. He is very sorry.

What did the mathematician say about vertical videos?

I'm sorry, but the video you filmed is imaginary. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What did Pink Floyd say to Jerry Sandusky?

Hey, teacher, leave those kids alone!

What's your favorite adult-themed Halloween joke?

My favorite is: "There's a maniac living in our neighborhood. He goes house-to-house leaving severed body parts on the doorstep. He gives me the willies."

Halloween Jokes More Halloween Jokes

What did the ghost say to the other ghost at the Halloween party?

Let's get sheet-faced!

What kind of protozoa likes Halloween?

An amoeboo!

Spanish Jokes More Spanish Jokes

What do you call s'mores in Spanish?

S'mas

What is a Spanish person without a car called?

Carlos