What happened to the dog that fell into a lens-grinding machine?

He made a spectacle of himself.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

Why are they arresting that dog?

What did he do?!? (My 6yo upon seeing a police dog sitting in the back of a police car.)

What is worse than raining cats and dogs?

Raining elephants!

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happened to the man running in front of the car?

He got tired. What happened to the man running behind the car He got exhausted.

How is working in I.T. like being a wizard?

You command vast powers beyond the scope of smaller minds, but to them all you do is wiggle your fingers and stuff just happens.

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What happens if Russians fall from an Afghan boat?

They sue Kabul Yacht.

What's the difference between a baby and a kilo of cocaine?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a kilo of cocaine fall out of a window.

Grind Jokes More Grind Jokes

What did the lesbian lumberjill say to her girlfriend?

Have I got an ax to grind with you.

What fruit did Hillary grind up in her juicer?

13 blackberries and 5 apples

Spectacle Jokes More Spectacle Jokes

What happened to the dog that fell into a lens-grinding machine?

He made a spectacle of himself.

Why do you never wear two monocles at the same time?

Because you'd make a spectacle of yourself.