What is a long distance love?

It's when you're in the office, bed is at home and whiskey is in the bar.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

What came first?

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face. The egg, looking a bit ticked off, grabs the sheet, rolls over and says... "Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question!"

Why did the spy stay in bed?

To stay under cover.

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

What do you call it when a Physics Teacher throws a bar of chocolate at you?

Brownian Motion

Why did the ghost go to the bar?

For the BOOOOze.

Home Jokes More Home Jokes

What fruit had to have an announced wedding at home?

Cantaloupe

Where does a burger feel at home?

On the range!

Office Jokes More Office Jokes

Why did the fruit leave office?

Because he was imPEACHED! lol. i hate myself.

What did the hurricane say to Hillary?

I didn't know disasters can run for office

Whiskey Jokes More Whiskey Jokes

What is a long distance love?

It's when you're in the office, bed is at home and whiskey is in the bar.

What did the judge order in his whiskey?

Just ice