What's the difference between a cat and a politician?

A cat will lie your face. A politician will lie your face.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a pest and vermin?

Walt Disney.

What's the difference between Marty Mcfly and a Bears fan?

Eventually, Marty Mcfly stopped going back to 1985.

Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

Why did the monster lie on his back?

To trip up low-flying aircraft.

What do you get when you mix a dyslexic, an insomniac, and an agnostic?

Someone who lies awake at night wondering if there's a dog

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

Why shouldn't anybody help cats down a tree?

Because they're stuck up

What did Dr. Seuss call the book he wrote about Star Wars?

The Cat in the AT-AT

Face Jokes More Face Jokes

What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?

I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.

Who are you talking to in there?

M: *stumbles out of pantry with Nutella all over my face* nobody

Politician Jokes More Politician Jokes

How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to change it and another one to change it back again.

What is the best place for politicians?

Election posters. There they are portable, silent and easy to remove.